Chivalry is in Critical Condition: Chipotle Micheladas

Chivalry is in Critical Condition: Chipotle Micheladas

Someone just messaged my friend on Scruff at 7 AM and asked if they could "make a breakfast of eating out your shitoris." He sent me text with a screen capture on his phone minutes after it occurred so that someone else could share in the utter revile of this horrible — though, admittedly clever — new turn of phrase.

ROMANCE!

Perhaps it's his own fault for forgetting to log out before bed last night? Either way, if chivalry wasn't dead this certainly bashed it in the the skull with a shovel. At least passion is certainly alive and kicking (you in the balls).

It's way too early for this.


Chipotle Micheladas

If you’ve never had a Michelada before, it’s like a Bloody Mary but with beer and Clamato juice in place of vodka and tomato juice. From the sheer sound of it the drink shouldn't be all that good. Yet, it is. Very. Savory, spicy, salty and exactly what you need to stave off the horror that are gay apps. This recipe will make you a solid pitcher; enough for a brunch with your best peoples.

Also, a big thank you to my photographer friend, Rachel Valley, for this image she took when we made this for a brunch. If you need a photographer with style and sass then you can't go wrong with her.

What You'll Need:

  • ½ cup freshly squeezed lime juice, rinds reserved
  • 4 cups Clamato juice
  • 4 cups Mexican beer, chilled (think Corona or along those lines)
  • 3 teaspoons hot sauce
  • 2 teaspoons Maggi or soy sauce
  • 2 teaspoons Worcestershire sauce
  • ½ teaspoon ground chipotle powder
  • Tajín seasoning, for rimming the glasses (found in most supermarkets and every Latin market)

What You'll Do:

Combine all of the ingredients except for the Tajín seasoning in a pitcher and stir together. Taste and adjust to your preferences.

Place some Tajín seasoning on a small plate. Using one of the leftover lime rinds wet the rim of a highball glass. Dip the rim in the Tajín seasoning to garnish.

Fill the glass with ice and top with the Michelada. Enjoy immediately and turn all apps off. For your own sake, just do it.

Functioning: Sunglasses Inside

Functioning: Sunglasses Inside

It Loves Attention: Loganberry and Flowering Thyme Spanish Gin & Tonic

It Loves Attention: Loganberry and Flowering Thyme Spanish Gin & Tonic